When the wound is in the foundations
Some wounds aren't from a single event — they formed slowly, in the environment of early childhood, through patterns of connection and disconnection, attunement and misattunement, presence and absence. Complex developmental trauma leaves its mark not as a distinct memory but as a way of being: a contracted sense of self, a distrust of the body, a set of adaptive survival strategies that once served a purpose and now constrain.
NARM — the NeuroAffective Relational Model, developed by Dr. Laurence Heller — is a body-based, relationally-oriented approach specifically designed for this kind of early, developmental trauma. It works at the intersection of the nervous system, identity, and the relational field — recognizing that the wound was relational, and that healing requires a relational container.
Identity and the nervous system
What makes NARM distinctive is its dual focus: the nervous system and identity. These two are deeply intertwined. The way we dysregulate — the way we collapse, brace, shut down, or go into overdrive — is inseparable from the story we carry about who we are and whether we are welcome in the world.
NARM doesn't focus on re-experiencing the past. Instead, it works in the present moment — with what is happening in the body right now, with the patterns that are showing up in the therapeutic relationship, and with the subtle ways identity distortions keep us locked in old survival strategies. It asks: What do you want? What gets in the way? Where do you feel that in your body?
"NARM doesn't ask 'what happened to you?' It asks 'what are you organizing around right now?'"
What NARM works with
NARM is particularly suited for people who have done work on themselves — who have insight, who understand their patterns — but find that understanding hasn't translated into lasting change. It works well for attachment wounds, chronic relational difficulties, pervasive self-judgment, disconnection from the body, and the sense that something fundamental is missing or wrong.
At NBT, Ingrid brings formal NARM training to her work. Sessions integrate NARM's relational and somatic lens with other body-oriented approaches depending on what each person needs.
Five Core Capacities
Connection
The capacity to be in relationship — with self, with others, with life — without collapse or withdrawal.
Attunement
The capacity to know what you feel and need — and to receive care and attunement from others.
Trust
The capacity to trust in yourself, in others, and in the support of the world.
Autonomy
The capacity to say yes and no authentically — to act from your own center rather than from compliance or defiance.
Love & Sexuality
The capacity to integrate love and sexuality — to be fully present in intimacy without fragmentation.
Your Therapist
In These Services
Questions about NARM?
Start with a free 20-minute consultation — we'll talk through what you're working with and whether this approach might be right for you.
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